Meet A Few Of My Friends

I was reading this article the other day (and I'm sure I've heard this concept before at some women's retreat) about three types of friends. As I was reading it, I was so thankful that three people came to my mind that fit these descriptions perfectly. They are so special to me, I thought I'd introduce them to all my devoted blog readers.

This is what the article says about the first type of friend: "First you need a Mommy friend who is in the same life situation as you, similar age and number of children. This is your friend who sees you really doing life, and then makes the effort to tell you how awesome you are as a Mommy (even though she’s seen your less than pretty side too). She’s your sounding board, because you’re doing it all at the same time period you support each other during the difficult times."

This would be my friend, Kelli. Kelli has three children. Andrew, 4, is just a month older than Amelia. Caleb, 3, just between Amelia and Lane and Bekah, 1, came just before Owen. Kelli definitely sees me doing life-the good, the bad, and the ugly. Sometimes I see her as such a sounding board that I have to remind myself that I am quite capable of making a decision without her opinion (it's just not as much fun!). Our talks most mornings at 7:45 are a regular start to my day. Our parenting goals are very common as well as our desire to be a godly wife. She is a good encouragement to me in both areas.

The article continues as it talks about the next type of friend. "Second you need a Mentor Mommy, someone who is a step or two ahead of you in life both spiritually and as a Mom. Ideally someone with more children than you, and who are older than yours. She’s your primary go to for the hard questions."

When I read this I thought of my friend Denise. Now ironically, I don't spend as much time with Denise as I would enjoy and benefit from. I mostly learn from Denise through Kelli, as she is her sister-in-law and next door neighbor. Denise has four children, Kimberly, Daniel, Jack, and Nathan, ranging in age from 14 to 2. Not only was she the facilitator of our parenting class, but just looking at her family is enough to know that I could learn a lot from her. When talking to Kelli about the various issues we face as parents of toddlers, she often defers to what she's discussed with Denise. Sometimes we do spend time together and when I'm not chasing my kiddos around I try to soak in some of her wisdom.

The other day (I mentioned this in another blog) I was losing it after a long day with the kids when it started pouring rain. I still had to go into Publix to get my prescriptions and the thought of lugging all three kids out of the car in the rain after the day I'd had was enough to send me over the edge. Anyway, Denise was the one that rode with me and waited with my children in the car. She wouldn't take no for an answer. She's always looking for ways to help other people.

"Last you need a Mommy to mentor, one that is just a little behind you in life situation and with younger children. This relationship must be brought to you by God or they may not be receiving of advice. In my life this sweet friend has been so good to me. She makes me feel like I am the most amazing Mom, even though I always think I’ve given such simple ideas to her."

Now, this third kind of friend is kind of a stretch because I most certainly would NOT claim to be a MENTOR to ANYONE. I do not have this whole parenting thing figured out. But there is a friend who I am a little ahead of in the age of my kids and she does make me feel like I am an amazing mom by being interested in some of the things I have learned. This would be my friend, Stacie. She has a three year old daughter, Ella, that Amelia has played with since Ella was old enough to play. We laugh together about the difficulties we have with our daughters and are able to be very real with each other about our imperfections as parents. My latest scheme (selfish, I know) is trying to get Stacie and her husband Cliff to move into our neighborhood. Why not make it even easier to spend time with people you love hanging out with?

Friendship is essential to my life. (Luckily I have married a man who also greatly values his friendships. That is not so common among men I am finding out. This plays in my favor when he extends great understanding about bi-monthly girls nights out. Thank you, Jason!) Anyway, balance is what they add to my life, among other things. I am so thankful to have them in my life. As the days of this blog go on, I'm sure I will introduce you to the rest of my girlfriends. I feel overly blessed in this area of my life.